The Angel Saxophonist: Viasonata Meditation #1
In what follows, I will show you the mystical power of (short) creative storytelling. TLDR it is a mirror for your life.
Here’s an unedited version of a creative story I skeptically created with my imagination based on symbols in three randomly selected tarot cards while training in the Shamanic Medicine Wheel.
Once upon a time there was an angel playing a saxophone in the clouds and the people of the world loved the music that it played. He was an excellent angel saxophonist, but wasn’t really in love with the music that he played. His music was therapy for the people of earth, and they worshipped him for it. They loved it as much as they did the sun. And so he became their sun to make them happy and healthy. So happy that they bathed in his music without clothing and would go out to feel even more connected to his work.
And then the angel died. He had a date with death and it took him swiftly and by surprise. Struck by his worthy adversary, he fell straight to the ground. Priests and people that loved his music came to mourn him from all over. As did the messenger that brought him down to earth. The angel was no longer separate from the earth, but a part of it in this state.
With the angel gone, the people of earth learned to love and appreciate the things around them, and to find value within themselves instead of seeking that in the sky. Humans began embracing their own godliness, and felt deeply connected to the earth, in many ways that they had not before, recognizing the infinite potential within each one of them. They now took care of themselves in a way that they never had before, after connecting with their own guidance system. The angel left them with a more powerful gift that he ever could have through his music. He left them with independence and self-reliance.
Rewriting the story in the first person changed everything for me. I was blown away by the perspective it gave on my current life situation.
Once upon a time, I was a humble angel playing a saxophone in the clouds, bringing joy and healing to the people of the world. At the time, I believed that my music was just a duty, not a passion. But ultimately, I learned that my music held a power beyond what I could have imagined.
I was the unhappy angel, playing music to satisfy others! And the more I did it, the more anxious, stuck, and stressed I felt.
As background, before creating Viasonata, the platform inspired by this story, I naively and optimistically left a promising career as an engineering leader to try my own hand at creating novel solutions (I mean, highly unconventional ideas) to corporate America’s opportunity problem. After years of rejection and blank stares, I found myself at a crossroads between success (from building what people wanted) and following my heart. Fearing failure, I muted my creative impulses, and started building solutions that companies suggested, even though I knew with complete certainty they would never create the outcomes the world needed. As an entrepreneur, I should have been as free as it gets, but deep down I still felt trapped.
And yet while I could easily see myself in the angel, the angel’s death pointed to a more profound realization:
“I” am as much the angel as I am the earth. In fact, I am all of the characters. They complete me. And they are my journey. “I” am the destination.
It’s relatively easy to see our self in the character we most relate to, because this is often the persona or social mask that we adopt in our external lives, but we are fully represented in everything that comes through our imagination.
The characters we have a tough time identifying with are those that we have yet to rediscover in ourselves. In paying attention to them, we unlock a new dimension of our awareness.
Similarly, the seemingly paradoxical themes of external validation and authenticity aren’t at odds, but instead two parts of a whole:
If “I” am all things, then I am both authenticity and external validation at once. In recognizing this, the distinction between these two ceases to exist. There is no longer any thing that can separate them.
As powerful as reflection is, here’s what comes through me when I go into a meditative state and free flow write about the story:
Little angel, you are so much bigger than you will ever know. You have tried so hard to please others, to make the world a better place, and to honor your talents. But you have not gone far enough. For what you do not know is that within your talents exists all that have come before you. The people the places the things. They will allow flow from you. But you must be in a position to give them a chance. And you cannot do this when you are playing without recognition of this. You cannot play for others. Others will play through you. THROUGH you. This is not something that you need to control, but something to let flow. This is how you serve the world. And it’s how you start to understand your real talent. Because your real talent does not come from you, as this tiny human trying to do things in the world, but rather from you as all that you are. From every single thing that wants to express itself in you. Your ancestors, your parents, your people, your past. The earth, the sky, the trees. You are all of these things. And in allowing them to be within you, you let them exist. You let them be alive again. For ever. Indefinitely. Through you they are given life. And they love to feel alive. For there is no death, but only transition. And as you transition, you will see this too. That you are always there. That they are always there in you. That there is no here or there. So let yourself play. Whatever comes to mind. And through you. For there is nothing to do except to give life to all that wants to be experienced. And all of that, is you. It is all you. Find your self.
That’s all for now.
Thanks for taking the time to be with me, and I hope to see you on Viasonata!
